Tuesday, November 29, 2011

Brief intro to me and depression

Its difficult to explain the pain of depression its even more difficult to have it described as a sin. Because surely sin is supposed to be a pleasure we are unwilling to give up to our Father, but instead depression is crippling debilitating and not something anybody would want to live with. I have learnt in the last few days that depression is a choice, a choice to believe the false truths about life and most importantly God.

I have suffered from this illness, and yes it is also an illness, for I would say for the past two years, in varying degrees and for various reasons. Before I knew the Lord it was despair at life and a continual feeling that this cant be it, a constant need for status as well as anger at God. When I accepted God I felt like my depression had Gone but the same sin issues that had caused my depression prior to my baptism had not been dealt with, they where just hidden disguised into well meaning feeling but I later discovered to be false thoughts where still there.

I feel like I am at a place where I am beginning to start to deal with all these emotions and thoughts and finally starting to realise the root sins that have caused my depression. I am nothing but certain I will get over this dark period of my life by applying biblical principles and through prayer. I wanted to start a journal to document my thoughts but felt a blog may be better because perhaps someone suffering from depression might stumble across and who knows my experience might be of help to them. I am by no means good at writing or grammar so forgive my errors and hopefully we can all get along.

So thus beginning my journey into womanhood.

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